By Dick Kunnert
Yeshua Institute Board Member, Master Facilitator
Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act.” Psalm 37:5
Everything tied to happiness is centered around trust.
Happiness is very hard to experience in an environment where there is no trust. Trust gives freedom to thought and action. If I am constantly on the defense, I am not thinking of positive ways to use my gifts in serving other people.
Traumatized kids are wary about relationships and trust.
How do people who can’t trust build community? Building the kingdom of God is predicated on helping people trust those around them so they can respect them first, then hopefully love them.
Why is trust so important? Trust is the necessary ingredient in every relationship – parent/child, husband/wife, employer/employee. Trust is the hallmark of every one-to-one relationship.
I can’t have a trusting relationship with someone if I’m not a trustworthy person.
- I keep my word?
- Am I on-time for appointments, events?
- Do I do as I say I will do?
- Do I ask the question: What would Jesus do? Jesus is the master trust builder.
- What’s your trust level with your Mom, your children, your boss, your pastor, your friends?
What steps can you take to improve your trust level with the most important people in your life?
“Perhaps the most important thing we ever need to learn is this: It is safe to trust.”
So says Father Ron Rolheiser, OMI, a popular and influential Catholic author.
According to Father Rolheiser, our religious faith can and should play a huge role in our ability to trust others. That’s because faith teaches us that “it is safe to be vulnerable because we are in loving hands. It is safe to surrender because we fall into light, not darkness. It is safe to be weak because the strength we need is found when we give up on our own power.”
When we trust that God is in control and loves us, “it is safe to live our lives with daring because God assures us the world is ultimately safe.”
But readily concedes that it’s not easy to believe that because none of us have been perfectly loved by others – and many of us have been traumatized in one way or another – “wounded, disappointed, betrayed” – and so we feel a deep need to protect ourselves.
In our distrust we are tempted “to show a superior strength, attractiveness, talent, intelligence, self-reliance and cool detachment. Distrust and self-protection are everywhere.”
But “deeper than all of our anxieties and our need to protect ourselves, lies a truth we know at the core of our being -- namely, that in the end we cannot take care of ourselves, we cannot make ourselves whole, and we cannot hide our weaknesses from each other. We need to surrender, to trust, to let ourselves fall into stronger and safer hands than our own.”
If you’re not doing it already, perhaps now is the time to pray for the grace to trust more – to believe ever more deeply and firmly that God is in charge and, ultimately, He will look after us and hold us close to Him. As our assurance in God’s abiding care grows, so will our ability to trust others … and then to love them.